Spirituality by Subtraction

Living in the now, being present with now, is the highest calling.  This is because the now is all we have.  We're not promised tomorrow, and the past is just that, the past.  We need to stop trying to create the now to be what we want it to be, and work harder at seeing it for what it is.  We need to learn to trust it, to trust the grace in the now.  This is because the now is where God is, and is where he is inviting us to be with him.  Anytime I hide behind the mask of fear, I'm not in the now.  Any time I've conjured up my own feelings, thoughts or reactions, I'm not in the now.  Seeking God in the now means letting go of my agenda.  It means finding God on God's terms, not trying for a personal accomplishment and then seeking God to bless it.

It's tempting to strive for a spirituality of addition.  It's tempting to try and cover all our bases with the right theology, then add a little of service to others, and then to go to sleep at night proud and self-righteous.  But we can do all the right actions with the wrong motives.  Was I moved by love by my actions, or did I do to look good in the eyes of others?  Did I seek to join with the efforts of love, to seek to participate in the joy that is found in communion with God, to know God for the sake of knowing God, or did I seek to check another mark on my "What I did" sheet.

I must acknowledge that while we are on this earth, our intentions will never be totally pure, sin will be right beside us.  But this shouldn't take us from the fight.  God doesn't shame us for this.  It takes humility to desire good, but to be patient with the bad in us.  Refining and purification is God's work, and our waging war against ourselves will not hurry the process.  Patience is a virtue.

I believe that our goal should be a spirituality by subtraction.  We need to cut the layers away, finding a place where we are in union with God.  This might mean we give up our hurried lifestyle, or our worries.  It might mean we need less of our own thoughts, or less of our own constructs, and more learning in quiet waiting.  It might mean that we need to be less quick to react, more quick to allow grace.

In the beginning of our lives, we come forth, beautiful and totally dependent on others.  I believe that the task of our life is to work to become with dependent on God.  When we die, we take nothing with us, only the soul lives on.  And our souls in this life are already longing for their home, we desire that which is eternal, we desire mystery and a love that will swallow up all.  Why should we starve our souls from what they desire.  Mystery is present, we need to learn to be present with it.  I believe this happens less and less by our actions, more and more through trust and faith.