Musing with Jars

Oh, be undismayed.  God hears your sigs and counts your tears.  Lift up your head.  Lift up your head.  Choose to commend.  Oh how wise, how strong.  Strong is his hand.  Soon and enjoy.  God will lift up, soon and enjoy.  Soon and enjoy.  Soon and enjoy.  God will lift your head.  Lift up your head.  Lift up your head.  God will lift up.

Will I run for cover, after the final round.  We go around and round and round again.  After the fight is over, will I talk so tuff.  Will I run for cover, get up get up.  Will I stand my ground, after the final round.  A reminder, will walking be a reminder.  Another thorn in my side.  After the fight is over, will I run for cover, after the fight is over.  Will I run for cover, get up get up get up.  Return my fist to fingers.  Will I get by.  

Dark thoughts you tangle, I wrote a letter on the pages of your mind.  Made you a ringtone with a voice that sounds like mine, when I'm calling.  I spent my money on the things you can break.  Don't know enough about love so we make it up.  Heartbreak is a killer on the loose it's after me.  Don't know enough about love so we make it up.  Ooooo.  Ooooo.  Get up get up get up get up.  Oooo.  Oooo.  Oooo.  

Every time I look in the mirror I'm in the shadow of doubt.  Someone to pull out the splinters.  A reckless forgiver, you know I'm talking to you.  Maybe I'm just as lost as the next guy, I just have to find out.  I leave it all for you.  Mmmm.  All I want is peace like a river, long life a love that doesn't leave too soon.  Someone to pull out the splinters, a reckless forgiver, I leave it all for you.

A world without end, fate that available excess, dismiss what we can't manufacture, compassion just sounds like complaining, hit the keys but the nots aren't sustaining.  Look in my eyes, touch my face.  Limping along in the human race.  Look in my eyes, touch my face.  We're limping along in the human race.

It's a little bit, it's a little bit late to, try for something better.  It's a little bit late to, try and cut the anchor.   I'll go there.  It's when I think to reach across those battle lines, still love in the hard times.  Still love in the hard times. 

Plant a dream down by the lakeside.  Some would say that we were young in hours.

Sound of television creeping through the halls, left in the wild, you fill the sky, through your bottles out to see and watch them float away.  Oooo.  Hide your diamonds in the dirt in careful rows, your heart, is broken by the things you love, tell of the world your leaving, you get buried under all this light, all the time, tell of the world you're leaving, swinging like a wrecking ball, 

I don't want you to forget, I don't want to, I don't you to forget.  

Fly.  I want to see it.  Love is skin and bones, some day soon, we're going to open our eyes, break out the windows and fly, a heart beating strong, on and on, some day all of the world we'll have a heart beating strong, on and on.

I can hear the, standing, look, I will try to make up for lost time, all I've done left undone, for lost time, forsaking all I've done left undone, all I've done, left undone, 

There are no streets to walk on, wander till you find you, you'll have to trust your heart, you walked on, turning inland where no man is an island, it's where you're supposed to be, inland, where no man is an island, make no corrections, hold your tongue and wager, that love will set you free, until it sets you free, you keep, come on home to me, leaving all, burn it in the fire, of everything you once knew, remove the shoes you wore, come on home to me, walking inland where not man, I will always stand next to you, come on home to me, I will always stand next to you

Made me, who am I, mercy waits, overjoyed, love is the thing this time I'm sure, the way that you saw things were so pure, thoughts of peace can overcome anything, Love is the thing this time I'm sure, the way that you saw things were so pure, overjoyed

With my headphones on, we watch television, with my headphones on, with my headphones on, at the tube stop, you sit down across from me, everything will be ok, so we go our separate ways, with our headphones on, I don't want to have to hear it, it's a heavy world, I don't want to have to hear it, Ooo I don't want to have to hear it, I don't want to have to hear it

Don't stop, don't stop for me, my recurring dream of you, starlight in your eyes and music everywhere, there are no days or nights we've left behind, when you're running, ya you're running far, and why is it so hard, and you can't run so far that I won't reach, there are no place I won't find you, and you all I want to do is be with you my love, don't stop for me, 

Lesson one, do not hide, and if you have questions we can talk through the night, so you know who you are and you, you don't have to run, lesson three, you're not alone, not since I saw you start breathing on your own.  You can breathe you can run this will still be your home, get there, you are not what you do, and when  you need it most I have a hundred reasons why I love you

We stand at the edge of something, save us from our fear, we're not going to let it end this way, we need a hero, to save us from ourselves, to save us too

No nails to untie the knots, we're letting who's wrong be right, you think you know my ending I think I know  yours too, even though the sun will rise. 

And sing below your window, I know it will come on, come on soon.  There might be a light, somewhere in your mind, I wait for it to shine, I know it will come on, they just come on, come on come on, there is no delusion, and I, there might be a light, somewhere in your mind, when you think of you and I, come on, come on, it will come on, come on soon

I tried to figure out all the mysteries of love, I thought that everything was meaningless, that you would forgive me, forgive me, I wasted another year, waiting for the word, and now I'm so afraid if I find the words to say, have I lost you anyway, and I've wasted another year, waiting for the words, for something to be more clear, and now I'm so afraid, as far the eye can see, as deep as the heart can be, such an impossibility that you would forgive me, 

I let get dark so you see the stars, no mountains to climb, papers to sign, offer your heart, I've given you mine, one soul to pour out, one love to catch all, Oooo.  No mountains to climb, papers to sign, offer your heart, I've given you mine, give me your heart, you already have mine, give me your heart, I've given you mine

But I try and I try, I up but I'm late, It will never save my soul, save my soul, save my soul, but I try and I try, no no no no, it will never save my soul, God can you take the weight off my shoulders, don't even try 

Hallelujah we can finally hear, lay our weapons down, there are no enemies in front of me, Hallelujah we can finally see, we didn't notice that grace had run so thin, lay your weapons down, there are no enemies in front of you, lay your weapons down, Ahhh, Hallelujah we can finally hear, Lay your weapons down, there are no enemies in front of you, 

If I two hands, doing the same thing, lifted high, lifted high, I use hand to pull you closer, the other to push you away, if I had two hands, doing the same thing, lifted high, lifted high, If I had two hands doing the same thing, lifted high, lifted high, and if we just keep digging we can reach the foundation of our souls, all the chains from our hearts will loose control, and you know it's coming, it feels like a brand new day, la la la la la, 

Tomorrow, Yesterday, Present

 Sing through me.  Strength in weakness.  Be my eyes, my voice, my hope, my freedom.  Help me to surrender all to you.  Holy, holy.  May dawn welcome a new day, twilight rest towards a new tomorrow.  Redemption.  May I sing and dance, with my boy, mind and heart.  May joy be my companion, may I trust you for each tomorrow, each yesterday, each present moment.  Be between, beyond, before.  That one day I will trust in you who surround me, let your healing presence be with me.  A new day, drawn from the storehouses of your love.  Where we came from, where we are going, everything in-between.  Have mercy on me a sinner.

May we see You

 Lord God, save me from myself.  May I rest secure in your arms.  Forgetting all else.  To be at home, and to realize that there is no place where you are not.  The hope of nations, the hope of humans, the hope of those who have come before, are, or will be.  May I look no place else.  May my life start and end with you, and have all the in-between.  Let it be you.   Let me stand upon your rock, course through my veins, let not my heart drink the bitter drink of judgment and bitterness.  Let my mind rejoice in you, you, who have not forgotten me, who is with me.  Be my strength, have my tears, let my sorrow find rest in you grace.  Be my true home, to where I turn.  Teach my mind to surrender to your grace.  Be bigger than my mind can conceive.  Let your loving energy be the skeleton holding me up.  Let me experience your heaven in the present, and then to go home to you.  Let my life be yours.  Sing your song over creation, that all may catch a glimpse, that we all may rejoice at your glory, that we may all see you more and more clearly all the time.  Have mercy on me a sinner.

Am I broken?

 Am I boken, Lord God, have mercy on me.  I don't deserve your grace, yet cover me with it, I have no where else to turn.  Lord God, where am I to go.  Depression knocks on the door, Lord God rescue me.  May I one day wake up in a land where it is you alone.  May my vision fail me so that you are my eyes.  Why do I do the things I do?  Have mercy on me a sinner.  Remove all from me Lord, have my body, my mind, my psyche, my soul.  May I delight in you only.  Forgive my sullen way of viewing the world.  Forgive my doubt and ingratitude.  May the treasures of my heart and mind be you alone, rescue me from depression.  May I rest upon you, and seek no other home.  I don't want to suffer, I don't want depression.  

Lord God, may I one day know you even as you know me now.  May I see you clearly, may I see the world as your creation, may I see you as the master painter brushing your strokes of grace.

That all may Belong

Celebrate.  He has come.  He has always been here.  Drugs nor alcohol could hold him back.  My minds euphoria doesn't compare with the simple beauty of ultimate reality.  Simplicity, maybe if we travel long enough into the in-between we will find the Maker.  Hidden in plain sight.  Between every word and phrase.  Between darkness and my doubt.  Seeking to shine through, to be more than an afterthought.  Maybe that which was behind, between, can make it's way forward, to be center.  To let all revolve around it.  The center, in it's rightful place.  All in all.  That I may not give way to negative voices, may I not hide in shame.  Hold me in your light, that which was in-between may be center.  Sing.  Dance.  Play.  We are invited.  We are called.   We are His.  Alive.  Trusting.  If only through a foggy mirror, if only every fifth thought.  That which is small can grow.  That which is only caught in glimpses can be the sun.  Let the sun shine until I have forgotten everything else with a less captivating glow.  That all may be one, that all may belong.

That I May Be With You

 To find that I could fall, around my heart.  Be my everything.  In the morning light, in the pale dark night. Be in my dreams, at night and day.  Be my heart, my very own.  Be my in-between.  My heart seeks refuge in your love.  Be with me, my day, as twilight approaches, however near or far, may my heart grow in your love.  My it practice for home even now, may it beat with more and more confidence, to know as it's known.  May the darkness not have the final say.  May it drift from me into the ever growing sea, that as time proceeds I don't know it existed, I don't remember its sting.  Help me to surrender to your love, that it might be better than I could have seen.  Be with me on this spinning ball through space, that your love may be within and without this universe.  Cleanse me over and again, that I may taste but some of your goodness.  That this weary world will not hold me down, that I may fly to you, realizing that you are the wings, the air, the starting place and the destination.  That I may be with you.  That I may be with you.

Love upon Love

 Do you remember what the city sounded like?  Let the days and nights blend together, so that there may only be one time, one place, yet everywhere.  Help me to surrender all the promises that don't bear what they promise, to the quiet whisper that is always true.  My schedules, my plans, the questions I ask, let them sink in the sea of your grace.  So that in the end there is just us and you.  Love upon love

That I may Know

Someone to pull out the splinters, I leave it all for you.  Have mercy on me, a sinner.  Cleanse me whiter than the brightest white.  Help me to give up grievances I have, to not choose bitterness, to leave what I don't need behind.  Let those I encounter see you, glow through me.  Time, is yours.  Space and infinity, is yours.  Why should I worry?  What do I consider my depression?  Why do I wonder if your absent to me? Help me tired bones to find rest in your grace, break through my dark thoughts with your glorious light.  Let but a flicker be sparked, that I may have a warm glow to nurture me back to health.  Be my home, in the midst of the many homes I try and find, be my home.  Whatever I am, whatever I am not, belongs to you.  Bring to yourself what is yours.  Have control, my senses activates by your energy, every part in harmony, every part one.  Let them not be just words on a page, but actualities ready to enter my heart and psyche, that I may know you are here.  Be closer to me than I am to myself. Bless me that I may catch some of your glow, that I may surrender control.  To be held, in the midst of, in-between.  Let the anchor of my drought give way against your great tide.  That I may see.  That I may know.  

My Souls Paradise

 It's a little bit late to try and cut the anchor.  Be my anchor, my rock, my salvation.  Help me to surrender being to you, letting go of all I am, letting go of all I hope to be.  To find you were here all along.  Calling to me, holding me, in the darkest recesses of my mind, you were there.  Be here with me, be here with me in the present.  Help my past not to haunt and wither my soul.  Help my soul be boundless with your love and energy.  Help me to over filling, let your grace but pierce my shell, that I may be touch a glimpse of your presence.  Help me to let go of helplessness, hopelessness, meaninglessness.  Be my one and only, let the music of grace flow freely through me.  Call me towards yourself, that your bell may ring through my being, alivened and brought home.  Let your mercy be within me, that I may catch a glimpse of your character.  Be my church, my home, my grace, my forgiveness, my shelter, my energy, my calling, my goal, my aim, my direction, my souls paradise.

Shine brighter than the darkness

Oh, carry me.  I am lost without you.  I need your love, your grace, your healing.  Help me to let go of my bitterness, of the sullen ways in which I have invested, towards self degradation.  Help to to surrender all, even the things I take pride in, the things with which I call it a successful day.  I am broken, I need your help.  Carry me through my negative patterns, when I choose bitterness or hopelessness, when I don't look past my own self neglect.  Carry me beyond my doubt, beyond obstacles in which I torment myself with repetitive patterns.  Let your love penetrate my thick shell.  I desire fluidity, I desire pure water, for my drought ridden mouth to taste pure water and be satisfied.  My crumbs have not filled me, my unhealthy dinner has not satisfied, my over-pouring dessert have let me wanting and alone.  I desire to be found, to be one.  Let not my bad dreams come to fruition.  Let not my deja-vu's hold the last say.  I desire you, here, in the moment, so I don't need to fight this darkness alone.  I feel so lost, so broken, so fragmented, that only you can restore me.  Let not this wanting be my final state.  Please bring about new flowers, spring rains, so that life can restore peace, so that I taste the promise land, that the Maker can call me by name.  Let summer shine, in my heart and mind, so that peace may be my friend, so that I see you everywhere I turn, so that grace my be my companion, so that help and love may be known to me.  Let your freedom be in me, outside of me, in the space between.  When I move forward, sink back, or find the space between, let me find you there, full of grace and truth.  Let me but bow at your feet, partake in your joy, celebrate in your hope, be realized just as you realize me.  My home, my true home, that, even when I don't feel it, shines brighter than the hopelessness that tries to have me succumb.

At Home in the Universe

I walk across a bridge.  Is it wide?  Is it narrow?  How many people shall join me on this bridge?  Is it reserved for humans alone?  Humans in this era?  

Catch all into the web which lies underneath all and everything.  The web which halls all into the Center, which makes us one, yet which does not nullify or diminish our identities.  We accelerate towards the center at a speed which we could not contrive, and yet the space is infinite.  We are moving yet ever held.  In arms of love yet partaking with those around us.  Mystics, farmers, accountants, athletes, and the world which holds us up.  But then take the picture out farther.  Planets, galaxies, space and time, all born from the Source, all returning to that from which it was made.  

Could the bridge be wide?  Could it span past death?  Could everyone and everything eventually walk it?  Could a gracious infinity await existence?  

Call my heart in your hands.  Call my pain into your grace.  Call my struggles into your living mercy.  Call my tears into your heart.  Mend my brokenness. Call me home.  

Call us Home

Never felt so cold, I need you.  Your presence permeates the Universe, calling us home.  Calling us home to ourselves, home to you.  Inside and out, we need.  Before our breathe wakes the day, before our consciousness awakens to the new earth, you heart beats in us, through us, to us.  Let me surrender to the love you already say is ours.  Already you call us home, already you  know our pain.  Already you know our thoughts, you work to ease them, maybe you tell us not to be so hard on ourselves.  Your love is born and waits to be born again and again.  Changing those who it is born through, and the recipients.  Until you are all in all.  You give us a name, our true birthright, glowing through the darkest night, until it alone envelops us and carries us through the fog in your glorious light.  Death hath no mastery over you, and you invite us to enter into your precious eternity.  Call us.  Lead us.  Love us.  Let us love you.  Call us upon the waters, down from the great height, in-between the physical matter.  Call us to love.  Pure love.  The catches us by surprise, but then becomes everything.  Shining in the dark, through eyes we cannot yet see, yet calling us to fuller times and fuller places.  Where all is one.  Where we melt into you.  Yet find ourselves at the same time.  Call us home.

Finally Home

 Finding him again, finding him again.  To go deeper.  Deeper in.  To realize that the depth I seek is nothing compared to the depth that seeks me.  My mind tries to seek a few steps ahead of me, to perceive and analyze it, to take it in.  However there is a depth deeper that the greatest sea already prepared for me. Indeed, the very nature of things is to grow in love, only to come to understand love grows me and everything, and seeks only the well-being of all that encounter it.  An infinite depth, from of old, always new. spanning eternity, without beginning or end, yet we never grow old of it.  Experienced as our true home, one that we will not tire of and therefore leave some day, one that holds all of the treasures and riches we've ever wanted, waiting to reveal itself to us.  Lo, even now it stands at the door and knocks, and will enter if we but let it.  For lo, it desires to fill all, join all, engulf all, encompass all, and be all in all.  

Many may seek it from different directions, different starting points, but it was present before our starting points and is the very ground we walk on.  It does not separate us in high and low, in young and old, in rich or poor, by our skin color, it only favors us, only desires us, only seeks to make us one.  It pours generously through the ages, dumping itself on generation after generation, with patience, confident in what it has in store for us.  

To feel you hands around my heart.  To feel, to know, to be known.  To be understood, completely accepted, radiant with joy, finally free, finally home.