Thursday, April 3, 2014

The true self

The true self is the fearless self.  It is the self that is connected with the larger picture.  It is the self that doesn't need to put others down in order to feel good about itself.  The true self is always trusting, always alive, always free.  The true self can let it's guard down because it feels no need to hide, no need to pretend to be what it's not.  The true self is passionate and integrated.  The true self doesn't need to defend it's boundaries because it's more about building bridges than drawing lines.  The true self doesn't  fear change, doesn't fear what it doesn't understand.  The true self is accepting of lessons from each other person, accepting other's uniqueness and creativity.  The true self doesn't fear death, knowing death is but the door to the next life.

We all walk in a world where the true self and the self society dictates to us are in conflict.  Learning to listen, learning to hear our deepest yearnings, listening to our deepest desires, can help us get in touch with our true self.  I believe at our deepest core we are a people that desires to be connected to others and the meaning in the universe.  I feel that getting in touch with our true self is an awakening of what's already in us, much less a striving for something we'll never have.  Here in this deepest part of ourselves, we know we are good, lovable, connected with the meaning that unites the ages and holds the universe together.  In our society, I feel that getting in touch with our true selfs is at least as much of an unlearning as it is a learning.  We need to unlearn the messages taught to us.  Messages like hard work always better, I need to look a certain way, more money means I'm more successful, conformity to the norm is the safest option, I need to protect my boundaries, there is a black and white answer to every question, I need to fear what's different from me, I can't learn from other people groups or religions, all need to be unlearned.  I feel that lessons we learn can become part of our psyche, and can drive us in directions we're not aware of until we unlearn them.

In my daytime job, I work as a mental health counselor.  I believe that one task of a counselor could be to reflect back to clients their story so they can see it more clearly and look for ways that their lives are dictated by other sources rather than authentically lived.  I believe this requires of the counselor and the client the grace and patience to hold competing ideas side by side without necessarily knowing which side is more accurate quite yet.  But in the supportive and compassionate relationship present in the room, the client can be encouraged to choose the best option, or the option that is most truly them.  I feel this brings up a good point about the true self.  The true self doesn't fear not knowing.  The true self  is open to paradox.  The true self knows it's but one part of the whole and that it needs everyone else's vision to have the complete picture.  The true self holds all of it's beliefs with open hands, not ever believing it has the corner on the market on any of its beliefs.  And, the true self doesn't feel bad about this, it knows that this is invitation to meaning beyond what we can see, an invitation into the divine.

Thanks for reading some of my thoughts on the true self.

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